The Austin Experience

The Mole is tired, not mentally just physically. It's been a long time since I've done this kind of marathon drinking. Who would have thought that you could ingest this much alcohol trying to watch high school basketball?

This weekend's trip to Austin to watch the boy’s high school championship tournament was fun and strange. Everyday presented a new experience, a new challenge, and on occasion, new friends. Though the Deuce, Dub-C, and I managed to stay out of trouble most of the time, all while keeping our alcohol level above the legal limit, the experiences we had will be things I'll never forget.

I'm going to elaborate later but to tease a bit, here is a list of things overheard throughout the weekend.

*Judge, your sausage is great.

*Taj has put on 80lbs since Van Wilder.

*Are you looking for the really intoxicated guy that we found curled up in some guy’s doorway, passed out?

*Talk slow, I'm with the police.

*I'm trying to stay out of the drunk tank, and you guys go to Brokeback Mountain?

*We've got a situation, we're a man heavy.

*My manager says you're cut off, but don't worry, I'll still serve you.

Further: Raise your hand if you've ever been cut off at 1:30pm...

*Come pick me up, I'm on the corner of Hippie and Pot Smoker.

*I swallowed wrong.

*My Bus doesn't go the Erwin Center, but if you toss your beers I'll take you.

*My son....(insert dad living vicariously comments here)

*Lets order every flavor of margarita they have

*Can't have kids, low sperm count, small sack, all cock

*(talking on the phone) Yeah, we're at an asian bath house. Flea just puked, we're singing karaoke, and about to get happy endings, where are you?